Candles & Diffusers

Meetings.

The icing on the arsenic cake that is any weekday morning, afternoon or evening. And speaking of evenings... didja have to schedule the WebEx for 6:15 p.m. on a Friday, Becky? All to tell me you’d put feedback in the Powerpoint? Because you couldn’t put that in a fucking email? Don't worry. I'll text you all my feedback on Saturday around dawn.

Bourbon in My Coffee Scented
Net Weight: Approximately 17 oz.
Burn time: 60 hours
Note: Because these candles are handmade, no two are identical.

It's ten a.m. somewhere.

Honestly, Saturdays were made for day drinking. And Sundays. And Fridays and Mondays and Thursdays. But don't feel guilty about it. It's exactly like going to brunch, except hold the chicken and waffles. You don't want all that heavy grease and gluten screwing with your buzz anyway.

Mojito Scented
Net Weight: Approximately 17 oz.
Burn time: 60 hours
Note: Because all candles are handmade, no two are identical.

Spearmint Gum Scented

Hand-poured 100% soy wax candle. Comes with old-school matchbook inside the lid.
Burn time: 4 emergency 1-hour burns
Net Weight: 3 oz.
Note: Because these candles are handmade, no two are identical.

Mommy's Time Out Wine Bottle Soy Candle

NEW ITEM ALERT! We just loved these recycled wine bottle candles. Made by a local artisan, each candle has its own personality. 

• Made with recycled wine bottles. 
• 100% soy wax
• Scent: Lavender

Relax Wine Bottle Soy Candle

NEW ITEM ALERT! We just loved these recycled wine bottle candles. Made by a local artisan, each candle has it's own personality. 

• Made with recycled wine bottles. 
• 100% soy wax
• Scent: Citron + Mandarin

Whispering Angel Wine Bottle Candle

NEW ITEM ALERT! We just loved these recycled wine bottle candles. Made by a local artisan, each candle has it's own personality. 

• Made with recycled wine bottles. 
• 100% soy wax
• Scent: Lavender

You're F'N Awesome, Just Like Me - Scented Vegan Soy Candle

You're F'N Awesome, Just Like Me scented soy candle will make the perfect creative and funny gift for that special person who you want to build up their ego, just to smack them down.

• Scent: Vanilla Brown Sugar
• Hand-poured with all-natural vegan soy wax
• 11oz Rock Glass container
• Approx. 1.25 lb each
• Size: 3.5"h x 3.25dia
• Burn Time: approx. 75 hours

Thanks Mom! For Putting Up With My Shit! Soy Travel Candle

Ms. Betty's Thanks Mom! Soy Candles will make the perfect creative and funny gift for that special mom who you want to let know she is appreciated in your own special way. Thanks Mom!

• Scent: Coconut Lime
• Hand-poured soy candle
• Made with all natural vegan soy wax
• 8oz tin container
• Size: 2"h x 3.125dia
• 35-45 hr burn time when instructions inside lid are followed

Busy Bitches Get Shit Done Candle - Mimosa + Mandarin

Light a fire under your ass (and the wick) – it’s time to get shit done. Even busy bitches live for happy hour, so this 11 oz rock glass has epic tipsy vibes. Need to pull an all-nighter …or three? Your badass vegan soy candle will burn for up to 75 hours. It’s gonna be lit.

• Scent: Mimosa + Mandarin
• Hand-poured with all-natural vegan soy wax
• 11oz Rock Glass container
• Approx. 1.25 lb each
• Size: 3.5"h x 3.25dia
• Burn Time: approx. 75 hours

These 12oz bubble ribbed glass candles are exceedingly charming with a fresh take on a retro vibe.

Top Notes: Ocean Air, Lime, Lemon

Top Notes: African Ginger, Lemon Zest, Bergamot, Crushed Black Pepper

Middle Notes:  Elemi Resin, Clove Leaf, Cinnamon Bark, Eucalyptus, Fresh Nutmeg

Base Notes: Tamboti Wood, Blackwood, Cedar, Sandalwood, Dark Teakwood

Top Notes: Cinnamon, Nutmeg 

Middle Notes: Patchouli, Vetiver

Base Notes: Tobacco, Sandalwood, Creamy Vanilla